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Post by morrich on Mar 20, 2011 22:06:41 GMT
Unfortunately, when people don't understand what you're trying to say, the only way I know is to try to repeat the message in another form. If that is "banging on", then I'm sorry.
I do think that some people have difficulty interpreting the written word. I'm serious. I write more often than I talk. Words need to be used carefully and read carefully. Lawyers make a fortune interpreting what people did and did not write all the time.
Maybe it would help if people read more carefully instead of instantly assuming there is a deliberate intention to insult or provoke?
(I still feel my point about SI and a written stud agreement has been missed, but as I use them and will continue to do so, I can't say it worries me particularly. I only offer my stallion at public stud as a service to other owners and can see why so many don't bother. I certainly don't need the money -- or the hassle!).
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Post by mullachbuie on Mar 21, 2011 19:50:17 GMT
I have no idea what you're on about with SI and written agreements, as I haven't read the posts. I don't think I have difficulty in interpreting the written word, but I agree that there are some who jump to conclusions and take offence. In some cases, I am quite certain that the words are intended to insult and provoke. Take, for example, your next post on here about stupidity. It follows fairly soon after this reply to me. I am not assuming that it applies to me, but it could easily be construed as that. You may think that is nuts, but what if I took offence? Does it matter? My point is that I think it matters how a person reading a piece of material can interpret it - if it is likely to cause offence, it should be re-worded, and not in an equally provocative way.
I am not a very serious person, I like fun and banter, but my grandfather taught us from a young age not to make people lose face in public - I feel this is happening throughout these forums.
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Post by getagrip on Mar 21, 2011 22:14:50 GMT
I am a member of this and the 'other' forum. I find the 'other forum' can be quite informative but somewhat scarey and I rarely post. I consider myself to be a fairly non confrontational individual and have my pony purely for pleasure. I am also relatively new to highlands, and find these forums invaluable ; so much can be learnt through the general and often lively discussion. I find I have made many friends on this particular forum and have enjoyed the encouragement and support from many of the members. Thank you! However, there recently seems to be an undercurrent of rather direct comments in certain posts and topics, some of which are aimed at individuals, which I don't personally feel are entirely necessary or constructive and not in keeping with the essence of this forum.
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Post by Highlander on Mar 21, 2011 23:04:32 GMT
We are not very good at policing this forum but then from the start we said we would not. I was one of the first to get the treatment from HPT because my opinion was different to theirs so I was sacrificed !! LOL I think we must have been going on here for almost a year and a half now and it does proof that these forums run better without constant meddling by the Mods ;-)
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Post by joseph on Mar 23, 2011 0:30:02 GMT
I'm like getagrip. I am here to learn, maybe give and receive a bit of support from other Highland owners, chip in on debate when I occasionally feel I have something worth 'inputting'. But, I enjoy reading posts from more experienced members - or how would we learn? we don't always have someone on hand or nearby to help, so these forums are good for that, or they should be, so long as people aren't scared to post for fear of being ridiculed. My grandfather was a good 'horseman', but sadly died before I was old enough to learn much from him. That is why I keep coming on here, to learn a little, share a little, and have a little fun in chatting to like-minded-people. We all have our own opinions, and that should be respected, but it's when it turns personal, I don't like it. I am a member on the other site too, but it is a little busy with people who obviously know each other well, I feel I don't have much to contribute. Anyway, worn myself out with my out pouring, nite everyone, take care
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Post by Fleas on Mar 23, 2011 17:06:34 GMT
I go on all the sites (nosy wotsit ha ha) I love my little hipos, I'm not competitive just a happy hacker and love the community feel that owning highlands offers. Everyone seems to know everyone else altho I know I am not welcome really on HPT since it begun out of the HPEC becoming members only, but mainly as I am from southern Essex and feel most of the posters do know each other and are obviously Scotland based. I am quite a stubborn person with my ideas and dont always agree or go with the crowd so it suits me here, yes it can get a bit personal here, esp if I have not logged in for a while and something goes off at a tangent but dont want to be an interfering mod with editing peoples posts and telling people off
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Post by twisock on Mar 23, 2011 19:20:02 GMT
I go on all the sites (nosy wotsit ha ha) I love my little hipos, I'm not competitive just a happy hacker and love the community feel that owning highlands offers. Everyone seems to know everyone else altho I know I am not welcome really on HPT since it begun out of the HPEC becoming members only, but mainly as I am from southern Essex and feel most of the posters do know each other and are obviously Scotland based. I am quite a stubborn person with my ideas and dont always agree or go with the crowd so it suits me here, yes it can get a bit personal here, esp if I have not logged in for a while and something goes off at a tangent but dont want to be an interfering mod with editing peoples posts and telling people off Quite right too fleas........we do not have to agree about everything to get on......OH would testify to that......It's good to have differing opinions and passionate debate, sometimes something changes or improves because of exactly that.
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Post by roddie on Mar 25, 2011 21:49:53 GMT
I go on all the sites (nosy wotsit ha ha) I love my little hipos, I'm not competitive just a happy hacker and love the community feel that owning highlands offers. Everyone seems to know everyone else altho I know I am not welcome really on HPT since it begun out of the HPEC becoming members only, but mainly as I am from southern Essex and feel most of the posters do know each other and are obviously Scotland based. I am quite a stubborn person with my ideas and dont always agree or go with the crowd so it suits me here, yes it can get a bit personal here, esp if I have not logged in for a while and something goes off at a tangent but dont want to be an interfering mod with editing peoples posts and telling people off Like you, I go on all the Highland Pony sites, fleas. That's because I want to learn as much as possible about this fabulous breed which I stumbled across less than six years ago. I know what you mean about feeling that most of the posters on some other sites know each other. However, on HPT, for example, I reckon I have actually met only about six other members in person and I am based in the north east of Scotland so I wouldn't worry about being down in Essex - the internet is such a great communication tool which allows us to share information with people we would normally never get the opportunity to meet! Anyway, to get back to the point I think I'm trying to make, I still think these forums are marvelous. How else could I get tips from someone at the other end of the country who, for example, is backing a youngster at the same time as I am.? I must admit, however, that I do feel a tad uncomfortable when things start getting personal and someone appears to be getting a hard time (whether I think it is deserved or not). But then, I just say thank goodness its not me and carry on reading all the posts anyway. I think it must be a voyeuristic streak coming out in me, or a case of schadenfreude. Modified to add: Back on topic - I am sorry you felt you had to leave HPT so I do hope that you stay with this one this time as I love reading your interesting posts. We all have a lot to learn from others' experiences, good or bad.
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Post by majandme on May 7, 2011 17:06:02 GMT
Haven't been on here for a while but it is an interesting thread. As some of you know, I am a Mod on the HPEC site and we have been accused of being too 'pink and fluffy.' I haven't been on HPT so can't comment on them but I think it's good to have a variety of sites, each with a different 'feel'. I like this one as it isn't afraid to confront issues straight on, but as I'm quite a laid back, placid sort of person (bit like my pony!), I tend not to get involved.
How boring if we were all the same.
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Post by twisock on May 7, 2011 19:17:02 GMT
I am convinced that there is a sycophantic element to most of these sort of sites/forums and that is where the "pink and fluffy" stuff so often comes from. Some people say what they think everyone wants to hear, when a person says what they really think, and think for themselves, folk don't like it.
Having said that, personally, I try not to ever mention names of either people or ponies in a derogatory manner ....... best to keep it general I think...... but there should be the capacity for debate, and if posters ask a specific question or bring a problem to the fore themselves I see no reason why we should not discuss it openly and not in a guarded fashion for fear of causing upset.
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dojo
Youngster
Posts: 464
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Post by dojo on May 7, 2011 19:58:54 GMT
i for 1 always speak as i see and expect others to do the same,honesty is the best policy after all
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Post by Highlander on May 9, 2011 21:38:40 GMT
Thank goodness we have not been accused of being pink and fluffy - I prefer our more honest and free chat !! ;-)
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Post by suilvensmum on May 10, 2011 20:47:56 GMT
I quite like 'pink & fluffy'!
Above all I like honesty, understanding, knowledgeable & interesting posts, advice, friendly, funny, happy & sad to name a few.
I detest outspoken with the intention to hurt, bullying and those who jump in for the fight, bickering and pettyness.
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Post by morrich on May 10, 2011 21:47:43 GMT
Thank goodness we have not been accused of being pink and fluffy - I prefer our more honest and free chat !! ;-) My eyes keep drifting off to the left..........
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Post by Highlander on May 11, 2011 10:55:20 GMT
I suppose that pic is both pink and fluffy !
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